Freaky coincidence

Just yesterday I wrote the post “My life in one line..”. It was all about obstacles in life and how to face it and about how I get nothing in my life without extreme adversity and the toughest road I would’ve ever crossed in my past. I don’t know if this was an intution, prediction or just plain weird, freakish coincidence, my life took YET ANOTHER unfortunate turn today in terms of my professional life.

I have been going through some tough shit(to say it as underrated as possible) for more than 18 months now in terms of getting my immigration  status together. I realized, NO ONE knows anything for sure. At the end of it, its you and your life. Every legal expert and professional guidance you get is merely out of their experience which is not fully fool-proof. So its you out for yourself in the big bad world at the end of the day. Cruel? Yup, that’s life.

I have encountered yet another bump in my road to fully ‘settling’ down and burying the (INS/visa) hatchet for good. I almost had it, I was so close that it was staring me in the eye, but now its gone far away in an instant second. That is my life, thats how it’s always been and now I realize that’s how its always going to be. I have to learn to live with it. Who can I fight? What can I fight? Who is doing this to my life? No one is really to blame.

So as I said in previous blog, all I can do and will do is hang on, fight, work towards what I want no matter how long and how tough. Believe me, I’m no saint. I am writing this blog after an excruciating 24 hours of miserable pain , nagging thoughts, self pity , hate for life, frustration, and just plain fury.

This is my therapy. There, I’ve said my peace and lets see where life takes me now. It certainly is the most bumpy, nauseous roller coaster ride of my life. Now I’m really ready to take more shit life wants to throw my way, thanks to my previous experience with this ofcourse.


2 Responses

  1. I think I can understand your feelings, though I like to think my ride is bumpier 😉 I missed the H1B boat twice! Spent many a few evenings cribbing, cursing the USCIS, USA, Bush, existence of God/luck etc (I am very vocal 😉 and if only my hubby dear hadn’t moved here we would have been happily elsewhere not having to worry about visas and GCs grrr!.

    Like you mentioned in your previous post even though the path has been tough I have usually got what I really wanted or atleast so I thought in my life, but missing H1 *twice* was a total bummer. Now I just stopped thinking/planning/expecting – let life take its course. Its so not worth wasting my present 🙂

  2. Yup, Let life take its course is the plan. Hey is there any other option really? 🙂

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